bubbles and crystals

The coffee is warm, drink it before it gets cold
cold coffee doesnt taste good
but what if he likes cold coffee
I never asked him!!

Lets go out, its raining
I have always loved the smell, the sound of raindrops
I want a house with a slanting glass roof
so I can see the water float.. so clear... won't it be wonderful!!
He always remained silent!!

One day i will write our love story
yes, we will ..... we must..... have our own story
everybody has a story....
ours will be full of life, love, emotions.... won't it !!
I never saw him cry ......

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That was fiction and this is reality. A few days back one my class mate passed away. She was my age ... just 19 years old. That made me feel that no matter what you do, how good you are, how bad you are .... you can die anytime ... anywhere... in any way.

All of us are living meaningful lives .. or atleast trying to find meaning in our lives. At the end .. we all want to just be happy and the ways in which we try to achieve this makes each one of us different. Some try to earn money, some find love, some want to have children and then grandchildren and if possible even see their children... some want all. Some just live ... some just die.

I wish before i die
I am able to experience love
just once
my friend died without knowing what it is like to kiss someone...
without getting a surprise birthday party
without taking a walk with someonon the beach
and I dont want to.

I am shouting right now,
to myself and saying
grow up.. there is more to life than just all this sentimental rubbish
(I am in love with this phrase!)
But right now
I just feel that i dont want to die alone
I am not able to say it
but it is a big deal
I am scared of never finding real love
never knowing if it even exists

there will be a story
my story
and the world will read it
i just have to begin writing it
and I will not write it alone. NEVER ALONE.