Some time back I didn’t think that terms like sexuality, feminity or masculinity needed any explanation let alone questioning.
That’s what most of us think even now. Notions of gender, sex, heterosexuality have become such integral parts of our psyche that we don’t even know where they came from???
This is a question that needs to be asked but instead we often assume the answer and that is society. As if we inherit these notions like some family treasure. Don’t we also need to question what society is?? For me it’s a hypothetical, nonexistent hypocritical man made entity. This definition might be wrong, right, it might change or might not but at least I have defined society in my own terms.
Similarly do we not need to give new definitions to terms like homosexuality because what we understand of it may NOT be our OWN UNDERSTANDING.
Language is the best medium for change. One example of this is the usage of the term HETERONORMATIVITY instead of heterosexuality. I got oriented with this term today in a lecture by Gautam Bhan and the people of Nigar Media.
How easy it is to define normalcy. How easy it is to believe in marriage because ‘what the hell! Everyone marries, my parents married and so will I ‘ But I’d like to ask that what is the relationship between love and marriage. Why does love need to culminate in marriage and if it doesn’t will it cease to be love…. NO. It will only cease to be legitimate love, which is another thing to debate upon. How funny it is when people get after your life if you are 22 and unmarried. But won’t care a damn if you are 22 and still not in love.
Maybe what we need now is a new language. Which has no rules and is different for every person. But which allows you to think and define things for yourself. Incase you don’t want to define then also it should be acceptable. We talk of modifying categories… I say lets not form categories at all!!
